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Feb. 21, 2025
Embracing Emotions: Balancing Spontaneity and Intellect for Inner Peace
Exploring the essence of living spontaneously, this episode emphasizes the importance of embracing emotions in real-time while maintaining awareness through intellect. By sharing personal experiences and practical insights, we encourage listeners to reflect on their emotional responses and foster deeper connections with themselves and others.
• Discussing the meaning of spontaneity in everyday life
• Sharing a personal story about parenting and emotional challenges
• Examining the risks of resisting feelings and emotions
• Promoting the significance of awareness during emotional turmoil
• Delving into the interplay between intellect and spontaneity
• Encouraging a mindful approach to emotional experiences
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Transcript
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Hello and welcome to another episode of the Bearded Mystic podcast, and I'm your host, rahul N Singh.
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Thank you for taking out the time today to either watch or listen to this podcast episode.
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If you are watching this on YouTube, do like, comment and subscribe, and if you're listening to this on your favorite podcast streaming app, do rate and review the podcast, follow it and, in general, if you are on Discord, you can follow me on there and I can and we can chat.
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So I wanted to talk about something that was coming up on when I was writing my course and it was something which I thought was important, and that is living spontaneously in the moment as much as possible.
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Now I know that we can't be spontaneous in the sense of we are kind of prone to our habits, we are prone to the way our personality is, we are prone to the circumstances we're in.
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You know, whatever is going on, that kind of sets up the stage for kind of what action we may do or kind of what action we may do.
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But what I mean by spontaneous is not more so that you do something like at a whim, but more so like if you're doing something, do it wholeheartedly.
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So if you are.
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You know, if happiness is arising, just be happy.
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If sadness is arising, just be sad.
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Don't resist anything.
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Whenever we resist something, we end up causing more harm to ourselves, causing more harm to ourselves.
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For example, you know, when we're kayaking or we're on the canoe going down the river and when we're going against the current, you know we have to put a lot more effort in.
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And when we put a lot more effort in, we get more tired and in the spiritual sense, we accumulate rajas sorry, tamas in this, this.
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So we get more lethargic and tired afterwards, but it's rajas in the sense that we have to do a lot more work, there's more hyperactivity, more activity going on, and that that will tire us out.
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So we want to be where we can be calm and cool, sailing.
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So the way for that is, you know, know to go with the current.
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Where the current is flowing, go there Now.
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Obviously that may also have its dangers, but what I mean to say is we shouldn't restrict anything in our life.
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You know, if you're feeling something, you're feeling something, just be open about it.
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A lot of times we we like to keep how we feel inside, and and sometimes it's good measure, because who knows what we're doing, what we're going to end up saying or doing.
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And I give a, a situation that happened to me today, where and where although I've said to live spontaneously, but sometimes that can only be the best way of being when our intellect is kind of sharpened so, um, we were, we're transitioning our son to go from, uh, his milk bottle to a sippy cup.
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Now, uh, it's challenging, right?
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So it's not easy.
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He's cranky, he's annoyed and he's playing up.
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So there's a.
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So you know, me and my wife take turns because we're working from home, we kind of share how we look after him.
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So you know, when I'm working, I'm, you know, I've got him sometimes, and then she's working, she's got him sometimes.
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So we just, we just see how he goes.
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And today, because obviously we're doing a change, he's's cranky, he's annoyed, he's showing his moods and he's obviously hungry too, but he does not want to drink from the sippy cup.
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Now there's a point when.
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So what happens is my, me and my wife are texting, and I just text her saying, um, and she's like you know, I've got a call and I've got this to do, and then let me call this person, and then I'll be more free.
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So I then text her after you know, maybe 30 minutes saying are you free now, can you take him?
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And at the and she didn't reply back and he was crying, and I think he was just hungry, so he was crying.
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And then you know I was getting, I was feeling anger towards my wife, like why are you not answering?
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And so go down and get some yogurt for my kid, for my son, for Christian, and start feeding him the yogurt.
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And my wife, I can hear her say I only just saw your message now.
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Uh, so Now, so Christian goes for his nap.
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So you know, put him in bed for his nap.
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And then I go for a shower and then I think about what's happened, like I'm angry at my wife, I'm thinking why didn't she, why didn't she check her messages?
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And then I was thinking, well, she had something to deal with at work.
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You know she's in the healthcare industry, so everything is more serious, and you know people's lives, you know kind of their health is important to everyone.
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So you know, and I was just, and then I was thinking you know, if she's busy, if she's had to deal with something, it's not like my wife to do this, so you know.
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So then my intellect was discerning.
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It was like, okay, and then the anger just dropped and there was no anger left.
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I wasn't pissed off that she didn't answer my message or that she wasn't there to help me when Chris was crying or just being cranky.
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So it's, it's.
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You know, situations in our family or situations like this they kind of show how sometimes living spontaneously means.
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Now, I didn't choose to show any anger to her, which was probably the best wise choice that I made, but that doesn't mean that I couldn't.
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I may have kept that anger in, and that can be bad too.
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That can have an effect too.
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So what I'm trying to say with this is that we, although we need to live spontaneously in the moment, and we need to first ensure that our intellect is in check.
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And today, you know, thankfully I had the time to even think about it.
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But say, in that moment I did get angry.
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It I would have added more stress to my wife's already stressful day, or, you know, a day where she's really busy, and I'm sure it's not easy for her to hear krish crying upstairs.
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I mean, yeah, it's, it's not easy.
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So you know, when we?
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So that's what happens when we, uh think, from a more higher level and then just naturally, you know, whenever krish was crying and that to comfort him, what I find really helpful is just going back to awareness.
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And actually when I'm consoling him, I don't feel like it's me as the father, the body and mind that's doing it.
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I go back to awareness and in that awareness there's that spaciousness of serenity, of calmness, of just being there, and that's all he wants.
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And and I've noticed, when I'm just there with him, you know, he leans back and puts his head on my chest and and kind of just stays there for a bit.
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And I just realized that that's what sometimes what he wants.
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He just wants to know that we're nearby, because he's obviously we're getting him to, we're trying to get him to learn to walk and he's obviously crawling, so he knows he's more independent.
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But that's a scary part in his life, that's something that's new for him and and you know, eventually he's going to be more and more independent and you know that's going to come and he's going to realize that.
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And so, yeah, although my video started by being spontaneous, I think I kind of showed how being spontaneous comes.
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We have to be very mindful about what it brings.
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But ultimately, what I mean to say is only someone with a great intellect knows how to act spontaneously and you shouldn't be tried by people.
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You know, for some reason, I think when people hear talks like this, I just be spontaneous, they hear it and then they just do whatever they want, but without thinking of the consequences.
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I don't think that's what these people mean.
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They kind of assume that you're going to work from a higher level of understanding and the reality.
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Because when we do act, from awareness for example, when I was contemplating what happened when I was in the shower, it was all about seeing from awareness, from pure consciousness, that what, what really happened.
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So what happens in that situation is the you kind of step away from the transactional reality for a bit, from from the vayavadika level, and you go to the paramartika level and you just see things from that perspective and you're like, okay, you know, this is what it looks like on the bird's eye view.
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My, my anger is not righteous here.
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And and suddenly, as soon as you say that it drops, it doesn't hold, it doesn't hold on and you can see it kind of drop away, like into the oblivion, because it's not going to return back, and this is how our vasanas get made.
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So, for example, if I acted upon the anger, then what would happen is that would be in the samskara, and if I continue to do that a number of times, that will become a vasana, a tendency that I would naturally do so every time I get angry.
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So the whole point that I've learned in this, and what you should learn in this, is be spontaneous for sure, but remember that the only a heightened intellect, one who is established in awareness, in formless awareness, can act spontaneously.
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And when they do act spontaneously, they're in there.
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So what I mean to say is you go with the flow of life, you're in the moment in it.
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Like right now, I'm recording, I'm fully into the recording, I'm not thinking about what's going on in the world or what's going on around me, and the same thing for when I'm eating dinner with my family, it's about eating dinner.
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When I'm on my phone, I'm on my phone and that's what, how we, how we must live.
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I don't feel that we need to always be multitasking or doing those things.
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I think it's okay to kind of step away and just do one thing at a time, and that's what I mean by being spontaneous.
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Now, it may be that if anger arises again and it's justified, maybe that anger can then find its outlet in a certain way.
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When feelings of love arise, let that feeling of love arise and blossom.
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When it subsides, let it subside.
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The whole point is just don't cling to a certain action that you want to do is all I'm trying to say Be spontaneous.
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So, for example, the reason why I said about being spontaneous although it looked like there was a massive thought process going on, the whole thing lasted for like maybe seconds, but it was also spontaneous of me to say you know, pause for a moment.
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Before you even think about lashing out or getting angry or reacting in anger, let's take a look at what the what the situation looks like, and that's all you have to do.
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So yeah, I mean this was the video.
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I know is a lot said, a lot of.
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I don't know if I was rambling for a lot of it, but I hope it was helpful to you and just remember that it's okay to whatever you're feeling right now.
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It's okay.
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There's no need to resist it.
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Accept it, it, and maybe that's what it was.
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I accepted that I was angry and it was normal to be angry in this situation.
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But was it normal?
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Was it right to react in anger?
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Maybe not so.
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So there's a difference, right, being angry and then reacting in anger.
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I can be angry and feel that emotion, but then I should go back to analyze whether an introspect, where is this coming from and is it justified?
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And therefore, do I need to react in anger or respond in anger, or can I drop it?
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That's all that one has to do, and this can be with every emotion, not just anger.
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It can be with joy, it can be with sadness, happiness, anything, peace, calmness, anything, wherever you may be feeling.
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So yeah, that's the video.
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Let me know your thoughts, let me tell me what do you do when you know these feelings arise, any feeling arises in you.
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What do you do?
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And keep it clean, by the way, but yeah, anyway, thank you for listening and I shall see you next time.
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Take care, namaste.
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